dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize