I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I could fuck to npr.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize