Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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