So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize