i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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