I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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