It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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