Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I am midnight drunk by noon
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Randomize
