doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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