you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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