Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
