I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize