no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize