my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
