I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
