Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
