So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
