I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
