So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize
