love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
