just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Me too!
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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