am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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