dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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