I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
