How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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