He disabled his match.com account in front of me
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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