Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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