i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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