Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize