Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
