a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize
