I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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