question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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