how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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