well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
