Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
You are the jesus of drinking
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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