theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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