if you like me you must not know who I am
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
