are you still at the devil's house?
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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