I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
