love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
