At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
