? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
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