so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i dont even know how to be here
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
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