i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
