So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
