you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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