you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
