Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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