guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize