Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Randomize
